Odalo out here holdin’ it down.

Just what, just when:


Kill Me ~ Heal Me & The Whole Twin Flame Legacy & Suicidal Tendencies

A K-drama (Korean Drama) + Cosmic Love template.

It’s taken my 2nd viewing of the drama to catch the connection and probably what is inherently the puller, but the Twin Flame/Divine Love Stratosphere is fully lit right now, pulsing, blinking, radiating and eradicating. Aerating. Doing what it’s here to do, fully pull you through and make you glo ALL  the way UP. 

If, you’ve reached the places of This shit done got me good and fucked up, this might make for a good relax n chill.

Kill me Heal me (KMHM)  is the usual twist of love+TV, a mix of ancient ceremony and a heartbeat as old as time: Two people fall in love and have to battle their demons and make peace with their daimons along the way. The intensity of it comes from the complicated back stories of the two main characters which must be unravelled upon a healing path for all things to be at peace. And as per, their journeys’ have wider implications of healing for others around them too.

Our man (divine masculine) in Cha Do Hyun ((Ji Sung), is as typical, a chaebol who has everything, plus a side order of pain in the shape of a personality fracture due to past trauma (soul loss), manifesting as DID – Dissociative Identity Disorder. His journey is to integrate the six other personalities that he contains within which pop up and in and out, whenever he cannot face the reality of what is in front of him and wants to tap out – whether just for a second, to handle a situation, for the day, or the rest of life. Hilarious and heartbreaking.  This touches deep.

Our woman (divine feminine) in Oh Ri Jin (Hwang Jung-eum), is a first-year Psychiatric resident at a hospital, slightly wild, a little messy, off-beat and a little derided all around. Her journey is to learn to go to bat for one person and one person only, but to put her healing and her selfhood first, come off the beaten path a little, in relation to helping to heal one,  ONE other – Cha do Hyun.

At one point in the drama, Oh Ri Jin is described as someone who grew up with over=reactive and overprotective parents which means that she looks fine on the surface but inside is a complete mess. She takes on her pain, and everybody else’s pain as her pain. And as it would go, she’s the one who needs to stop going along and getting along to keep the peace, and when it’s presented, turn and uncover her. Her life as priority. Her place called home  within. There’s simply no escaping you. This can be a very good thing.

Integration is the key that together they search for. Of the lost parts, of shadow manifesting sideways because is isn’t given light of day and right of way, and of remembering the past long forgotten, not to dwell in it, but to reconcile it, heal the fractures, the splinters and the breaks, become whole and to let it go.


And who is the third man? That third-party stuff is global, but go see for yourself – watch on Viki.com. But in sum total, the acting will knock socks off.

I shall revisit this post and likely keep updating, but I’m still watching it, in the midst of the Universe smacking me in the face – lovingly – with it again for my own good, miracle and sanity.

***Triggers abound*** this I will say, mainly around the psychology of abuse – physical, a and emotional, anxiety and mental stress. Also around keeping super huge secrets as a growing child, and the continuation of this as an adult and how that can leave your Psyche hanging. If you were the pristine-out-front-but-fucked-behind-closed-doors-but-didn’t-know-it-for-quite-some-time family; it may help with release. But in watching this, I’ve discovered alot of lost parts of myself, I’ve recovered things that were buried fairly deep, and also been able to grieve for what needed to be washed with tears and let go. And sometimes it was just from pure laughter. Even if just the isolation of thinking that I was the only one going through it – I wasn’t, you’re not.

But two things:

  1. If you have never seen a K-drama before, you’re in for a treat, and this is stellar.
  2. Should you be in the midst or mists of the Twin Flame epidemic/awakening/community/initiating – sceptical or not – it is literally what it says on the tin: Kill me Heal me. It is the bitter medicine that we have to drink – this can be the spoonful of sugar because as deep as it is dark, it’s light as it is love. Spun spun dark golden sugar carefully peeling back the leaves of intertwined history and mystery of what makes a person whole and what keeps them from so.

Another two things:

  1. If you’ve ever dealt with feeling suicidal anxiety, or suicidal, again this can be beautiful medicine for you. It’s not mandatory for the Twin Flame journey, but for some, the hurt was already that way and the journey won’t let you deny its existence but force you to face it and overcome. This for me, has been a way to release the harm I didn’t know about that may have caused me to so deeply carry the pain.
  2. If TV isn’t you thing – treat it like a book, 20 chapters. Worth it in the end. I recommend watching 4 episodes before deciding if it’s worth it.

The theme tune alone is a soul poem of  that unfathomable love/connection deep within that will push, pull  and draw as it begs for expression.

Shout out to the Writer: Jin Soo-wan and the Directors: Kim Jin-man & Kim Dae-jin.

Here’s a link to the first episode to get you started:


+ Shout out to all the Viki subbers who put their all into the translations for the subtitles – you out here saving sanity and lives xxxxxxxxxxxx

If you’ve been holding in, from fear or whatever, watch and exhale.

**Spoiler Alert** – skip this bit if you need to but if you’re right now in  any way  or have been in any way suicidal- your nails are screaming down the walls & you need an emergency safe place, then -whenever, wherever, please note this:

“If you want to die, then die.
But die tomorrow.
If you feel it’s hard for you tomorrow as well, then die the day after that.
If you feel the same pain the day after that, even if you die the next day and the day after that, it won’t be too late.
If you live each day at a time like that, then a good day will definitely come.
There will come a day when you’ll tell yourself, ‘I did a good thing by not killing myself back then’
~Oh Ri Jin
Kill Me Heal Me Episode 14, 49m46s. viki.com

You, are not alone. Use the drama to help you stay on the planet. Each one Teach one ~#E1T1.

Lots of love to All. The one we show outside and the ones who live inside. Here’s to the royal road to the One that the we is for. Unity. Union.

Happy Breathing.